‘Why am I feeling left out?’ There are moments when I look around and feel like I don’t quite belong. It’s like I’m standing on the outside of a glass wall, watching everyone else connect, laugh, and share something I’m not a part of. The feeling of being left out isn’t just loneliness—it’s an ache, a quiet pain that whispers, « You don’t matter as much as they do. »

I try to brush it off, to tell myself that it’s all in my head. But then the invites that never came, the group chats I’m not included in, or the conversations that continue as if I was never there, remind me that maybe it’s not just paranoia. Maybe I really am being left out. And that thought? It stings.

I start questioning everything. Am I not fun enough? Am I too quiet, too awkward, too much or too little of something? The self-doubt creeps in, making me believe that if I was just « better, » I wouldn’t feel this way. But the truth is, this feeling doesn’t always stem from reality—it often comes from my own fears and insecurities.

Sometimes, I realize I put myself in this position. I avoid reaching out because I don’t want to seem desperate. I assume I won’t be missed, so I retreat before I even give myself a chance to be included. And in doing so, I create the very loneliness I fear.

Other times, it’s not about me at all. People are busy. Their worlds don’t revolve around me, and it’s not personal. But that doesn’t make it any less painful when I feel forgotten.

Social Media Makes It Worse

Scrolling through social media is like pouring salt into an open wound. Seeing pictures of friends hanging out without me, inside jokes in the comments I don’t understand—it’s a constant reminder of my absence. And yet, I can’t look away. I search for proof that I do belong somewhere, that I am valued, and when I don’t find it, it reinforces the belief that I’m invisible.

The hardest part is breaking the cycle. When I feel left out, my instinct is to withdraw further, to protect myself from more rejection. But isolation only deepens the pain. Instead, I need to remind myself to:

• Reach out. Maybe they didn’t exclude me on purpose. Maybe they thought I was busy. Instead of assuming the worst, I can try initiating plans.
• Stop seeking validation online. Social media is a highlight reel, not reality. I need to remind myself that it doesn’t define my worth or my relationships.
• Find my people. Maybe I’m trying to fit into spaces that aren’t meant for me. Instead of forcing connections, I can seek out those who genuinely make me feel valued.
• Be kind to myself. Feeling left out doesn’t mean I’m unlovable or unworthy. It’s a painful experience, but it doesn’t define me.

I Am Not Alone

Feeling left out is one of the most isolating emotions, but the irony is that so many people experience it. We’re all just searching for belonging, for a place where we don’t have to question if we’re wanted. And maybe, just maybe, if I open myself up to connection instead of assuming rejection, I’ll find that I’ve been included all along.

-With love, H.

And you tell me about your experience down below ?